When my husband, Eric, suggested we have a third child, I knew something had to change. I wasn’t going to take on more responsibilities while he lazed around like a king. After I told him exactly what I thought, he threw me out, but not before I turned the situation around.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you reach your limit? That’s what happened to me when my husband asked me for another baby, as if I didn’t already have my hands full raising two children practically on my own.
What followed was a confrontation that I never saw coming.
My husband, Eric, and I have been married for 12 years. I am 32 and he is 43. We have two children: our daughter Lily, who is ten, and our son Brandon, who is five.
Raising them has been my full-time job while keeping this house running.
I work part-time from home to help with the bills, but I’m still in charge of everything. By everything, I mean cooking, cleaning, dropping the kids off at school, doing the laundry, bedtime routines and much more.
Eric, on the other hand, believes that his only job is to “provide”. And that’s where his responsibility ends. He has never changed a diaper, nor stayed up with a sick child, nor even packed a lunchbox.
It’s exhausting, but I love my children.
I have accepted that I am basically a single mother while Eric sits on the sofa watching sports or playing video games. But that doesn’t mean I’m not frustrated.
Last month, my best friend invited me out for coffee. It was the first time in weeks that I had the opportunity to leave the house to do something fun.
“Eric, can you look after the kids for an hour?” I asked her as I put on my shoes.
Her eyes remained glued to the TV. ‘I’m tired. I’ve been working all week. Why don’t you take them with you?’
I sighed. ”Because I want a break. It’s only an hour. They’ll be fine.”
Eric rolled his eyes and picked up the remote. “Katie, you’re the mom. Moms don’t get breaks. My mom never needed breaks. Neither did my sister.”
I clenched my jaw. “So Brianna and Amber never felt overwhelmed? They never needed a minute to themselves?”
“Exactly,” she said arrogantly. ‘They managed very well. You should too.’
That’s when I lost my temper.
“Eric, your mother and sister probably felt exactly the same as me! They just never said it out loud because they knew no one would listen.”
Eric made a dismissive gesture with his hand. “It doesn’t matter. It’s your job, Katie. You wanted to have children. Now take care of them.”
I felt like shouting.
“They’re your children too!” I said. ”When do you look after them? When was the last time you helped Lily with her homework? Or played with Brandon? Or asked them how their day was?”
“I’m going to work to keep a roof over their heads. That’s enough.”
“No, it’s not enough!” I replied. ”Giving money is not the same as being a father. You are their father, Eric. They need you.”
“Well, tough luck. I’m not going to change things.”
I stared at him, speechless. How had I ended up married to someone so selfish?
A few days later, Eric started mentioning having another baby. At first I thought he was joking. We could hardly cope with the two children we already had.
But the more he mentioned it, the more I realized he was serious.
The next time Eric mentioned having a third child, it wasn’t a passing comment. He was serious.
It started one night at dinner. I was cutting up Brandon’s chicken nuggets when Eric, casually scrolling through his phone, said, “You know, I’ve been thinking… we should have another child.”
“What’s that?” I said, turning to him.
He looked up. “A third child. I think it’s time.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “Eric, I can barely manage the two we already have. And you want to add another one?”
He frowned as if I were the unreasonable one. ”What’s the problem? We’ve already done it twice. You know how it is.”
“That’s exactly the point,” I said, trying to keep my cool. ‘I know how it works. I’m the one who does all the work. I’m the one who’s up at night. I’m the one who’s running around like crazy, trying to keep everything in order. You don’t help.”
Eric’s face darkened. ’I support this family, Katie. That’s helping.”
“No, it’s not,“ I exclaimed. ‘Being a father is about more than just bringing home a paycheck.”
Before Eric could respond, his mother, Brianna, who had stopped by earlier to ’visit the kids” with her daughter, entered the kitchen.
“Everything okay here?” Brianna asked, her eyes fixed on us.
Eric sighed dramatically. ”Mom, she’s at it again.”
I rolled my eyes. “Again, what?”
“He keeps telling me I don’t help out with the kids.”
Brianna pursed her lips as she took a seat. ‘Katie, honey, you have to be careful. A man doesn’t like to feel criticized by his wife.”
Criticized? I was fuming. ’I’m not criticizing him. I’m asking him to be a father. There’s a difference.”
But Brianna didn’t hear her. “Eric works hard to support this family. You should be grateful.”
Grateful. Right. For a man who thought fatherhood ended with conception.
“And you’ve already been blessed with two beautiful children,” Brianna continued. “Why wouldn’t you want another one?”
She heard our conversation. How nice.
“Because I’m exhausted,” I said flatly. ”I already do everything myself. Why would I want to complicate my life even more?”
It was then that Amber, Eric’s sister, intervened, striding into the kitchen as if she owned the place. “Honestly, Katie, you seem a bit spoiled. Mom raised us both without complaining.”
“Sure,” I said with a bitter laugh. “And I’m sure she never felt overwhelmed. She just kept quiet because no one would have minded if she did.”
Amber’s eyes narrowed. “Well, maybe you need to toughen up. Women have been doing this for centuries. It’s what we do.”
I turned to Eric. ”This is exactly what I’m talking about. You’re stuck in this old-fashioned mindset where women are expected to take care of everything. It’s not fair.”
“Life isn’t fair, Katie,” Eric shrugged. ”Get over it.”
I stared at him, feeling like I’d hit a wall. He wasn’t going to change. Neither was his mother or his sister.
That night, after Brianna and Amber had left, Eric brought up the third child again. This time, his tone was more insistent.
“You’re making a fuss over nothing,” he said as we prepared for bed. ‘We have a good life. I take care of you and the kids. We should have another one.”
I turned to him, at my breaking point. ’Eric, you don’t take care of me. Or the kids. You hardly know them.”
He stared at me, expressionless.
“You’re not the great father you think you are,” I continued. ”And I have no interest in being a single mother of three children. Two is hard enough.”
Eric’s jaw tightened, but he said nothing. He left the room, slamming the door.
I heard his car start and, moments later, he was gone. To his mother’s house, no doubt.
The next morning, I got up early and drank my coffee in silence. The children were at my sister’s house. I had called her the night before, knowing I needed someone to lean on.
I didn’t expect Eric to come back right away, but I wasn’t surprised when Brianna and Amber showed up instead.
They didn’t even knock on the door.
“Katie,” Brianna began, entering the kitchen. Amber followed her with her arms crossed and lips pursed. ‘We need to talk.”
I leaned against the counter, keeping my cool. ’I don’t know what there is to talk about. Eric and I need to work things out on our own.”
Amber scoffed. “That’s exactly what we’re here to help with.”
“I don’t need your help,” I said, my voice firm.
But Brianna didn’t back down. “Katie, dear, you’ve changed. You’re not the sweet girl my son married.”
That comment hit me harder than I expected.
For years, I had tried to live up to a version of myself that they had in their heads. I was no longer that girl. I was a grown woman with responsibilities that they couldn’t even begin to understand.
“You’re right,” I said, staring straight into her eyes. ”I’m not that girl anymore. Eric married a teenager. Now I’m a woman who knows her worth.”
Brianna’s face turned red. “What did you say?”
I folded my arms. ‘You heard me. And honestly, if Eric has a problem with how I run my house, he should be here talking to me. Not sending you two to do it for him.”
Amber’s voice was sharp. ’That’s not how family works. We support each other.”
“Really? It’s funny how that support only seems to go in one direction.”
At that moment my sister came in. She took one look at the scene and immediately sensed the tension. “Is everything all right here?”
Brianna turned on her. ‘Who are you?”
“Your sister,’ she replied with a sweet smile. ”And you two need to calm down. Otherwise, I can call the authorities.”
Brianna’s face twisted with rage, and I braced myself for the avalanche of insults. Sure enough, she started saying that I was “ruining” her son’s life, that I was a bad wife, and that my children would grow up hating me.
But I remained unmoved.
They finally left a few minutes later, slamming the door behind them.
That same day, Eric came home. I heard his footsteps before I saw him, and I could feel the tension as he entered the kitchen.
“So,” he began, his voice cold, ‘have you insulted my mother and my sister?”
I folded my arms. ’I didn’t insult anyone. I told them they had no right to interfere in our marriage.”
Eric’s expression darkened. “You don’t love me. You don’t love the children. You’ve changed.”
“I haven’t changed, Eric. I’ve grown up. There’s a difference.”
Our argument began to circle, escalating, until it finally exploded.
“Pack your things and leave,” he demanded, pointing to the door. “I can’t live with you anymore.”
I was stunned, but I didn’t argue. I packed my bags and stood at the door, ready to leave. But before I went, I turned to him one last time.
“The children are staying here,” I said. ”Whichever parent stays in this house will be responsible for them. They’re not going anywhere.”
“Wait… what?” he asked. ‘That’s not going to happen.”
“You heard me,’ I said calmly. ”You wanted me to leave, fine. But the kids are staying.”
So, I left with my sister without listening to anything else Eric had to say.
He tried to call me later, but it was too late.
In the end, Eric refused to take custody of the children, and I filed for divorce.
In the end, I kept the house, got full custody and received substantial alimony payments. I’m glad I stood up for myself before it was too late. Do you think I did the right thing? Or did I go too far?